Sunday, February 19, 2006

Let's Talk about the Olympics

I wanted to care, I really did. I wanted to get swept up in the pageantry and the excitement and the competition. I wanted to bleed red, white, and blue. I wanted to get teary-eyed during the national anthem.

But I just couldn't. I just don't care.

I like the luge and the bobsled a lot. I like trying to knock down figure skaters (a little known power I possess - seriously). I like watching short track speed skating. I like downhill skiing and snow boarding.

But this year, I just don't care. I just couldn't.

I am not sure if it was the silly opening ceremony, but it wasn't any more silly than other ones. Maybe it is central time, where everything starts an hour before I am ready for it to start. Maybe it's that other networks have worked hard at keeping my attention by programming new shows instead of rolling over and playing dead during the Olympics. Maybe it's that there are so few commie-pinko countries left to root against.

It certainly isn't that Michelle Kwan pulled out. I don't care. It certainly isn't that Bodie Miller keeps falling or whatever. Yawn. And it's not that Apolo Anton Ono still has that goofy soul patch. I am actually fond of facial hair - shocker.

Maybe it's that I just named the three Olympians I can. And maybe it's that NBC's crew is old, tired, and uninteresting. I tried to watch, really, I did.

But I just couldn't. I just don't care.


A said...

Maybe it is that most of the USA olympians have sucked?

Bode has choked.

That snowboarder chic showed off and fell.

The snowboarding guys kicked butt.

Even the speed skaters fought amongst themselves.

This is one olympics that chanting USA, USA, has not been an impulse. And I have watched a lot of them.

Sandy Mc said...

so how'd the Bay City MI speed skater kid end up doing?? I watched log enough one day to realize he existed...I just don't watch TV...

Cathy said...

How can you not love curling?

A said...

Curling and the snowboard cross have become two of my favorite events. Seriously.

Cathy said...

Kevin got us completely hooked on curling, he was fascinated by it. I still don't understand it, but it is fun to watch.

Andrew said...

There is so much to hate about this Olympics. I have tried to watch, but it is so frustrating. Here are my top frustrations:

#1 Everything seems so contrived. I realize that they can't show much live footage, but it is so hard to build suspense when it is so obvious that the TV producers are staging everything.

I am no fan of ice-skating, but my wife is, so I suffer through those segments. Two gripes:

#2 Who let the BCS guys sabotage the scoring system? I knew things were screwed up when during the pairs competition the Chinese pair did one of those spectacular throws except that instead of landing on a skate the girl landed on her knee (Maybe Robb was jinxing the communists). Anyway, they must have had the reincarnation of Mr. Miagi for a trainer because she went from gimp to crane kick in like 30 seconds. She gets back out there, and get this - starts from where they wiped out - that's right - they resume the program, finish it, and win a silver medal. How can this be? That’s not how you are supposed to score figure skating.

#3 But at least the figure skaters have one thing the ice dancers don't: a modicum of modesty. Have you seen the outfits those people wear? Does the scoring system include degree of difficulty for the effort it takes to create an outfit that simultaneously reveals and conceals everything? Even the guys' blouses are out of control.

#4 Unwarranted enthusiasm. I'm so glad that Vanessa defined this phenomena, because this is how often it occurs during Olympic coverage: always.
The worst example is the TV crew that covers luge/bob-sled/skeleton. The male color commentator is always beside himself with excitement and it is hilarious.

#5 Being force-fed celebrities/superstars. Do you remember when people were celebrated for their accomplishments, not simply for being American, overcoming adversity, and/or being a medal contender? I would rather appreciate people who actually do something, like perform in the Olympics, rather than just show up and underachieve.

Ok, that’s my top 5. But there are so many more.

Want to know what would redeem the entire event?

If they put together a compilation video of all the wipeouts of the entire Olympics – that would be awesome. Everyone would watch that. It would be like when non-NASCAR types watch the news from Daytona, just to see the crashes. Someone has got to do this.