We had our first Vespers service last night at Vintage. These services, the brainchild of Jonathan Perrodin, our Formational Leader, are designed to create a space for us to be with God. They incorporate liturgy, art, music in new and unexpected ways. I am so thrilled about Vespers that I hardly have words to express my excitement.
This first Vespers service focused on Saul and his encounter with Jesus that so profoundly changed his life. Because he had met Jesus, his life as he knew it was over. A new life was emerging, a life that he lived that was not his own.
In that time of prayer, I had a breakthrough.
For the past several months in general ... the last day in particular ... I had been doing some complaining about my life. I had been complaining to Vanessa about the traveling I was doing. I was dreading being away from home. I was wishing that I could live a different life than I was living.
God knows what I want. And yet he has chosen to give me the life I am living. Who am I to complain about it? Who am I to be bitter or angry or pouty because my powerful, gracious, and wise God has decided that I don't yet need what I want. I need what I'm getting.
I wouldn't be happy if one of my kids was treating me the way I was treating God. And I'm sure God wasn't all that happy with me.
So, I didn't just leave my candle at the foot of the cross. I left my bad attitude and my complaints and my unholy discontent about the life God has given me. I was changed by the grace of God at our Vespers service.
Go. In Peace. Indeed.